existential psychotherapy

Response to the following post :
I completed a lifestyle assessment that was based on the work and theories of Alfred Adler, an Austrian psychiatrist, and once a student of Freud, who developed his theory of psychology known as individual psychology, and invented the idea of lifestyle assessment. According to Cherry (2021), “Adlerian theory is a holistic approach to psychology that emphasizes the importance of overcoming feelings of inferiority and gaining a sense of belonging in order to achieve success and happiness.” He stressed the importance of how the social context influences our beliefs and behaviors. Adler believed essentially that a person’s “lifestyle” was a behavior pattern that is adopted in childhood that is used to overcome the sense of powerlessness encountered throughout life. According to Pawley (1999), as life evolves, the adult ‘lifestyle’ becomes a technique for moving from inferiority to command in any situation, but also a means of coping with feelings of inferiority induced by failure.

This version includes information about family constellation, birth order and character traits and relationships among siblings and parents, family values, early recollections, dreams, assets and self-defeating perceptions about self. It is designed to identify an individual’s core beliefs about self and others, his/her rules and values about life, and the goals that have been set.

Existential psychotherapy explores questions about the nature of being human, and understanding the nature and experiences of anxiety, guilt, despair grief and loneliness, as well as creativity and love. The existential model of personality focuses on the dynamic inner conflict of the individual and “givens” of existence. According to May and Yalom (1989), four ultimate concerns or “givens” that represent the content of inner conflict include Death, Freedom, Isolation and Meaninglessness, and the fears and motives that are generated by them. At the center of the existential structure and results from the confrontation with the four “givens” is anxiety. Without adequate coping mechanisms for anxiety, psychopathology can result. Because the existential view of personality structure focuses on the depth of experience at any moment, the therapist will try to obtain an understanding of the patient’s current life situation and fears rather than focus on the past.

One hallmark of the existential psychology that resonated with me is the idea that most people, most of the time, live in denial of our full humanity, consumed with the “business” of everyday tasks and conformity to societal norms, which can result in living an inauthentic life. According to May and Yalom, (1989), “To live authentically means to be aware of your freedom and your duty to create yourself, of the inevitability of anxiety, guilt, and death. It means to accept these things in an act of self-affirmation. It means involvement, compassion, and commitment”.

In reviewing the life assessment that I completed, from an existential perspective, I constructed the following conceptual example of my profile that highlights how a therapist might address some of these issues.

Being the fourth child ( and second girl of 4 girls) of eight in a family headed by a successful and respected physician father and a mother who was a stay-at-home mom with an education in nursing, there was an unspoken expectation for all children to work hard and be successful, but also to conform to family values and rules. I happened to be the more rebellious of any child, and most often fought with the oldest, who was also female, but she was a pleaser to my parents, where I was perceived as a challenger. All siblings wanted the approval and attention of our father, and there was often feelings of guilt and disappointment in ourselves when we didn’t meet these high expectations. It was also difficult to stand out among so many siblings and to be accepted for any individualism or traits that made you “different” outside of measures of achievement. Many of my most difficult struggles through life have been feelings of not accomplishing enough, and for being too self-critical. If I don’t meet my, sometimes unrealistic expectations, than I am a failure. In an effort to be “successful”, I am always putting emphasis on constantly “doing” things and rarely focus on simply “being” and/or placing value on “who” I am, instead of “what” I am professionally.

From an existential perspective, I feel that I am a person who embraces the given of “freedom” in that I take responsibility for creating my path and world, and am willing to take action to accomplish my goals.

However, as a child of a large and close family, needing a very socially active life and close connections with others, and starting a family of my own in my twenties, I am acutely aware of and fearful at times of isolation or loneliness. This is an area that likely causes anxiety around being “alone” or of not constantly being with others. I have constructed a life in which I spend very limited time alone.

For issues related to this, a therapist might help with confronting isolation by encouraging periods of intentional isolation and ways to better manage feelings and coping with fears and anxiety of being alone.

I have also struggled for years with deciding what path would be the most meaningful for me, and often talked myself out of certain choices because of fears of failure or that it’s simply too late in life. Though I have made this decision to pursue another degree at this stage, I still struggle with self doubt or anxiety around whether it will be the “right” decision.

A therapist might explore my belief systems, reasons for doubt, and long-term goals. In addition, there should be an assessment of my levels of engagement in the world around me. May and Yalom (1989), suggest the solution to the problem of meaninglessness is engagement, which is intrinsically rewarding in itself.

According to Holland (2020), regardless of the technique used, the goal behind existential therapy is to let people grow and embrace their lives, their wishes, and their curiosity without fear of the four givens. If successful, they can live authentic lives filled with self-respect and self-motivation and can make choices from places of positivity, rather than fear.

ANSWER

Existential Psychotherapy

Many people don’t live their lives as their authentic selves. They base their lives on the social norms of living rather than exploring themselves. Through which they learn what makes them they like and dislike. Existential psychotherapy shows people how to achieve this and let go of the fear of the unknown(Bell,2018). This paper will address the response to the topic.

The way psychology is influenced. According to the writer, the mentality about life and general living is influenced by childhood experiences and values. A good example is if a child grows up in an environment where values of love and care are embraced, then the same values will be depicted in their adult lives(Vanhooren,2018). The adult version of people is the reflection of their childhood. Having this in mind, existential psychotherapy helps one now embrace those experiences and values.

What existential psychotherapy is all about. It helps explore and answer many of the greatest questions asked by human beings. Why do they react and behave in a particular way? What makes up the nature of a human? A therapist listens to the experience improves the patient’s current life (Vanhooren,2018).

Effect of existential psychotherapy. When one identifies some values or experiences that are rather unpleasing about themselves, the therapist gives solutions to do away with them(Bell,2018). For instance, if one fears interactions and has social anxiety. Then the therapist can recommend going out to events and at least having a conversation with one or two people. This will help eliminate that fear, and soon, they will get the hang of it. Through this, people accept themselves and create the best version of themselves.

In conclusion, existential psychotherapy helps bring out better versions of people, thus making the world a better place filled with more vibrate and optimistic individuals.

References

Bell, T. J. (2018). Career counseling with Black men: Applying principles of existential psychotherapy. The Career Development Quarterly, 66(2), 162-175.

Vanhooren, S. (2018). Experiential–existential psychotherapy: Deepening existence, engaging with life. In Re-visioning Person-Centred Therapy (pp. 151-163). Routledge.